like steel encased in velvet
Apr. 8th, 2012 11:07 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
brandywine28Some marvelous soul has compiled some of the most cringe-inducing lines from 'Fifty Shades of Grey'. My personal favorite: "I found some baby oil. Let me rub it on your behind."
brandywine28![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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Date: 2012-04-09 03:57 am (UTC)Oh, dude. I clicked the link you provided... and I'm. I. THIS is being professionally published? And made into a movie?? That's just painful to contemplate. And those bits of the book aren't helping. OW, MY EYES AND BRAIN.
What do I have to do to get Absinthe Makes into a movie? Jesus.
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Date: 2012-04-09 09:40 pm (UTC)Oh god--if you made it past the third chapter you're a stronger woman than I. I bowed out somewhere around the fifth or sixth mention of Edward's 'unnerving green-eyed stare'. We get it! He's intense! Sheesh.
An Absinthe movie...Uh, don't mind me, I'll just be over here. Fantasizing.
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Date: 2012-04-10 01:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-12 09:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-09 09:10 am (UTC)Not to mention the sex isn't even good and is extremely boring and repetitive. Also ALSO despite all the talk of "European soccer" and "British Literature" (what editor decides that this is an acceptable way of getting rid of Britishisms?!), there are still bits of British slang in there like "does what it says on the tin", "shouty", "rated me" (as in "thought highly of me") and AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH.
KILL IT WITH FIRE.
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Date: 2012-04-09 10:18 pm (UTC)I'm can't believe all the Britishisms weren't corrected before publication! Didn't anyone bother to edit this thing? (I've studied 'British Literature' and I can assure you I've never referred to my ass as my 'behind' or used the phrase 'does what it says on the tin' or, well, any of it, really.)
I'll get the matches, you get the kerosene. :)
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Date: 2012-04-10 09:33 am (UTC)I'm assuming you might want an answer to this question and aren't just venting. (Though I would understand the vent!)
Publishing is in dire financial straits. Here's a novel with huge word-of-mouth and practically guaranteed sales, so yeah, somebody's going to leap on it. See also novels by Snookie, Nicole Richie, Lauren Conrad, Hilary Duff, etc. Nobody's publishing them because they're works of literary genius. They're publishing them because they sell.
I like to look at it this way: the more money publishers make, the more novels by unknown authors they can take a chance on. Though, more realistically: the more money publishers make, the less likely they are to go under next week. It's really bad out there, as I understand it.
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Date: 2012-04-10 01:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-09 12:10 pm (UTC)Thanks for burning my brain. *glares at you*
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Date: 2012-04-09 10:28 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-10 09:35 am (UTC)And I kind of like this one: “Poor, f—ed up, kinky, philanthropic Christian.” My kind of character!
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Date: 2012-04-10 10:14 pm (UTC)Mainstream publication? A movie deal? For a mediocre spanking epic? Hot damn. There's just something about all this fuss that I can't stomach.
So that's the story. I'm catty and spiteful. Now you know. :)
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Date: 2012-04-11 11:21 pm (UTC)I suppose the world is long overdue for another 9 1/2 Weeks or Wild Orchid.
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Date: 2012-04-14 04:19 am (UTC)